I am pleased to announce our new baby girl is here. The road was long and rough, and I feel so blessed to have her in my arms. The weekly ultrasounds, weekly shots, and daily meds were all worth it.
Born Nov 17th, weighing 5 lbs 6.6 oz 191/4 inches.I am sorry for the delay in sharing her with you, I had a very traumatic birth that rocked me to the core. You can read our story below.
We expected some complications with the surgery as I have had extensive damage to the uterus but we had never planned for this. It took approx 40 minutes to get her out through the layers of scar tissue, and the Dr explained that the bleeding was excessive and was not stopping. I just sobbed and held my amazing husbands hand.
Once she made her entrance, I got to hold her and love on her but the pain started up. I started feeling twinges I shouldn’t have been feeling, so they gave me some pain medication. That’s all I remember. My husband said the Dr looked over the screen and said ” If I can’t stop the bleeding she could die”. He was escorted out of the room while the staff started calling for blood and for more Drs.
My husband stayed with the baby, and prayed to God to watch over me. My mom was alone in the waiting room on her knees. It breaks my heart to think of the pain they went through. I had 4 transfusions of blood products, and multiple others of plasma and platelets. I woke up in recovery after the 4.5 hour surgery, feeling like I was hit by a semi truck. The Dr came in and said “I am sorry but we had to take out your uterus”.
That felt like a whole other semi truck.
I feel broken, and just got to the point where I can make it a few hours without crying. I feel emotionally drained and just broken.
I love this baby to death and feel so blessed to have her in our life but I am grieving the fact that it is over. I will never be pregnant again. I will never feel that life growing inside me. I will never get to pee on a stick again(I love it- call me silly).
Yes, I have 4 children but it doesn’t make the pain go away. It hurts. I just keep asking God to send me peace. I need it. I have faith that he will provide for my needs, it is just a matter of waiting.
Please keep me in your prayers, as I recover physically and emotionally.